The Lion exterminator
by TheVillianStratigest
Summary: Robb Stark kills a bunch of Lannisters.
1. Chapter 1

**The Lion exterminator.**

_Robb Stark kills a bunch of Lannisters._

**So uh, yeah. I was a little bored today so I decided to write this crack fic. Its not meant to make any sense or be realistic. I just wanted to write something funny for Game of Thrones, and this is what I came up with. Let me know if I should continue or not. Enjoy... if you do. Note: Mentions of a few characters outside the game of thrones Universe.**

''WINTER IS COMING!'' He yelled as he charged alongside his direwolf Grey wind at the 30,000 Lannister Soldiers coming at him. With 3 strokes he killed them all as Greywind leaped and bit Stafford Lannister's skull in half, while his paws crushed Alton Lannister.

'' LIONS ARE LITTLE PESTS THAT NEED TO BE CRUSHED LIKE COCKROACHES!'' Robb yelled as he turned to face Jaime.

'' YOU WILL PAY FOR THAT INSULT BOY!'' Jaime yelled just before Robb sliced his head off, in such a powerful arch that Jaime's head flew far beyond the battlefield where it finally crashed through the Red Keep, crushing Cersei to death.

* * *

With every single Lannister dead for hundreds of miles, Robb stopped and Greywind howled so loudly that Joffery was forced to cover his ears in the Red Keep, accidentally slipping and landing right in front of Tyrion, who slapped him so hard he broke his neck.

Robb took out a fire arrow and intended to burn the bodies but the arrow flew so far, so fast that it landed in the caves of the Stormlands, hitting Melissandre and burning her alive just before she could give birth to her shadow assassin.

* * *

1 hour later Tywin was yelling at everyone for not saying anything, only to realize too late they were dead. Robb crashed through the tent alongside Greywind.

Tywin was not pleased. '' So boy, it seems that you have gotten ahead of yourself. I will make you suffer though. You will learn ALGEBRA-'' and Robb impaled him right through the bowels and withdrew his sword, now covered in molten gold.

'' WINTER HAS COME!'' Robb shrieked as he dealt with the lions on four legs, beheading Aslan and Mufassa in 2 strokes just before kicking Casterly rock apart like a sandcastle as the stones tumbled down the sea, crushing Jar Jar Binks home.


	2. Exterminating the Whitewalkers

**Chapter 2. Robb Stark kills a bunch of Whitewalkers.**

'' NO ONE WILL SURVIVE WINTER!'' Robb yelled as he and Greywind jumped into the Wildings camp south of the wall. Within 2 minutes Robb and Greywind pulverized the entire camp and turning the remains into thick chile, solving world hunger.

He charged towards Mance Rayder's tent.

'' I have the horn of winter, I am the king of winter, I will use it unless you complete my demands!'' Mance threatened to Jon Snow, Robb's cousin.

'' OUT OF THE WAY BITCHES, THIS IS MY WINTER ALONE!'' Robb screeched as he pulverized Mance into a thousand pieces of Jerky, further fixing world hunger.

But the horn blew three times, signalling Whitewalkers coming to attack the wall.

* * *

The nights watch prepared to defend the wall- '' OUT OF MY FUCKING WAY!'' Robb yelled as he kicked down the wall, crushing a bazillion White-walkers and their zombie minions. The rest continued to charge.

'' FUCK YOU FREEZING BITCHES!'' Robb yelled as he rode atop of Grey-wind as he blasted zombies everywhere with his machine gun which for some reason fired giant shotgun shells.

When he was finished, he jumped off Greywind and wrestled 10 undead bears to death, strangling another 200 Whitewalkers with their intestines.

Every single Whitewalker exploded into dust as Robb rode back towards where the wall once stood.

* * *

Stannis stepped out and greeted him. '' Robb Stark, I see you have taken care of the Whitewalker threat. However there is still the matter of the Iron Throne, which belongs to be, and you kneeling to my rule-''

'' FUCK YOU BITCH!'' Robb screamed as he shot Stannis in the face with a giant shotgun so hard Stannis flew into the land of always winter, crushing the Great Other- an angry abominable snowman.

'' THIS IS MY WINTER AND THIS IS MY KINGDOM!'' Robb yelled at everyone else as he slapped Janos Slynt's head off.


End file.
